Devotional: Are We Good Christian Leaders?
by Charlie York (Guest Speaker)
by Charlie York (Guest Speaker)
The meeting today marked the two year anniversary of the NMIC Men's Ministry. With it, we had a first - the first external
speaker to give a devotional. Charlie York is retired Marine and a Christian since 2001 who attends the United
Methodist Church in Williamson. He shared some testimony from his life in his devotional titled "Are We Good Christian
Leaders?" Here is a document Charlie put together in preparation for his talk today.
Are we good Christian Leaders?
Good Morning,
First of all I want to tell you how I ended up talking here today. How Mike Fragassi and I met and how we got to talking
about Christ... another mutual acquaintance. Mike and I became good friends and he asked me to come here today
and speak at your men’s ministry meeting. I knew I wanted to talk to you about Christian Leadership, but my struggle
was …what part of being a Christian leader do I talk about? A Christian leader in your community, your church, your
job? I can talk all day long about any one of those. But where does God want us to lead more so than any of these
places? And God said to me "in your home Charlie." We MUST be Christian leaders in our homes first! This is what
God has told me to share with you all today.
To reinforce this, just recently I was listening to a Christian radio station and the pastor was asking the audience “what
kind of legacy will you leave behind – how will your loved ones remember you?” Those kinds of questions should make
us all take a good long honest look at ourselves. But we might not like what we see. The pastor also said “the best
indication of your character is if those who know you the best respect you the most”. Wow! That made me do some
thinking. Who do you think knows you the best? Probably your family right? So the question is – do they “respect you
the most?" Because if they don’t – then you have some work to do. I understand from talking to Mike that this church
has been doing a series on leadership. So as men of God I need to ask you this. What are you doing with these
leadership tools that God has given you recently? Has it made a difference in your life? Are you changing your ways?
Or are you saying – well, I’m not really much of a leader? My reply to that is -- Nonsense! We are men and God has
equipped us all to be leaders. We may lead in different way and at different capacities but we are all leaders.
Brothers – this world, our community our churches and more importantly our homes are in desperate need of
leadership. Now is the time – this is the time for a “transformation”. What do I mean by this? Do you remember the
Marine Corps Commercial where the young civilian is climbing the side of a cliff and during that climb he transforms
from a young civilian to a Marine in dress blues snapping to attention on the top of the mountain? The commercial
says “the transformation is forever”. I loved that commercial – because it is so true. These tools God has given you
can help you make that transformation…very similar to the Marine commercial – if you choose to accept the challenge
and responsibility. Your relationship with Christ, with your wife and with your children will be blessed because of it.
Many of you may not know, that I spent 21 years in the Marine Corps and I in fact I took that climb up the side of that
cliff…from an irresponsible 18 year old kid to a 40 year old Leader of Marines! It is true “the transformation is
forever”. It was 24 years ago now and I am since now retired, but I now realize that it was God who was “transforming
me” all along. Through his grace, he has “transformed me” from being a leader who used to influence people to do
bad things – to a person who influences people to follow Christ. That is why I am here today -- to sharing my story on
Leadership.
I was the youngest of seven kids born and raised in a rough neighborhood in Rochester NY. My mom and dad were
both alcoholics and were never home. My older sisters actually raised us younger kids and all of my siblings dropped
out of school. I had very little discipline in my adolescent years which allowed me to always get into trouble with the law.
Fighting, stealing, vandalism, breaking into homes & businesses, etc. Before I was a teenager I was partying with older
kids, skipping school, getting suspended for fighting (with teachers), and so on. I had a reputation of a crazy kid who
would do anything and it got out of control. I earned the title of juvenile delinquent and spent a lot of time in family
court. I never had a relationship with my father in fact I hated him. I was very angry and nobody knew it. I acted like I
had it all together – but I didn’t like myself. However, I pretended that I did. When I was in high school I never played
sports because I needed to work, so I could have the money I needed to support my image. I always had money,
friends, a cool car, an attitude, beer and respect -which of course brought on popularity. I thought I had it all -but I was
still very unhappy inside. This recipe was dangerous however. If you asked my friends, I'd bet they considered me a
leader -- only the type of leader that influenced others in a negative way. The same kinds of leaders that still walk the
halls of the schools today – trying to influence today’s children. Around 10th grade a kid by the name of Tim moved
into my neighborhood. Tim was a skinny quiet kid -but somehow we became best friends. I called him Bones. (Tell
story about Bones).
Bones wasn’t the only one. I influenced many others as well. My life continued out of control and alcohol became my
drug of choice. I joined the Marine Corps out of high school and continued on this destructive lifestyle. Except now the
Marines thought me how to fight even better. This was not good. My wife asked me to share a true story with you (bar
room fight) – it sort of paints a picture of where I was with my insanity. Many thought I was absolutely nuts -after that –
to include myself. Many stopped challenging me – which was great – because I was going to loose badly in a fight
someday, and I was not worried about my physical being, I was worried about my reputation. I was sick. By the time I
was 24 I had been arrested for assault, had (2) DWI’s and (1) DWAI, and totally wrecked (3) vehicles and a motorcycle.
I walked away from every accident. Instead of this being a wake up call, I thought I was tough. I thought I was lucky – I
thought I was invincible. I used to brag to everyone about it – so I could sustain the 'tough guy' image. Finally in 1989
I rolled my new truck in downtown Sodus Point and shortly afterwards got another DWI. New York State sent me off to
rehab, and it seemed to be working…I was only 24 years old.
Things began to change quickly after I stopped drinking, I attended AA meetings and soon got married. Shortly after
that learned that I was going to be a father which I was excited about -through all my insanity I always enjoyed my
nieces and nephews and really did want to be a dad. It was just then that Suddam Hussien invaded Kuwait and my unit
and I were deployed for the Gulf War. I was the Platoon Sargeant for a motor transport section. Although this war was
brief compared to most – it was a life changing experience. And although I did not know God then – it’s crystal clear
now that he was still trying to get my attention, yet I ignored Him still. When I returned from the War, my wife was past
due and a few days later I was a father to a handsome baby boy named Corey. I had only been sober a year or so
however, as I held him -I promised him that I would try hard to never make him ashamed of me… the way my parents
made me feel. By the grace of God he is 16 years old now and by the grace of God -I have not had a drink or drug in
over 18 years.
Being sober didn’t mean all was well. About 8 years ago Corey’s mother decided to end our marriage and I couldn’t
handle it. I always thought that after everything I had survived, nothing could take me down -- but I was wrong. Nothing
can prepare you for divorce. I did not want the marriage to end and I did not want “visitation” to the son that I loved so
much. I did not want to be “a part time dad”. Feeling hopeless even after 10 years of sobriety, I walked away from my
job without notice and I actually lived in the hills of Bristol for over a month. I parked my truck on logging roads and
bathed in the spring fed streams. As the weather started to get cold and I felt I had no where to go – I got even more
depressed and I decided I was going to end my life. With a gun in my hand at the base of an oak tree on top of a
beautiful hill, I was going to do it.
I took a picture of my son out of my pocket to say goodbye and that is when God spoke to me. He said NO – he needs
you. This was a very firm command and it worked. I proceeded to cry for what seemed to be hours – God used my son
to save my life. After that I realized I have to get off my pity pot and become a man – A Leader – an example for my
son. Not a pitiful mess. I came home and showed back up to work – and the office manager asked me to come to her
house…she was a Christian… and she knew I was hurting. She shared her heart with me, her love for the Lord and
told me that Jesus loves me and he can help me. On September 26, 2001 I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior –
my life began to change immediately. After spending a few years on my own, God put Sandee into my life about the
same time I was preparing the deploy for the War in Iraq. I then struggled between serving my country again and being
a father to my 11 year old son and starting a new family.
Sandee had a daughter Taylor that I loved to pieces. I had enough years to retire and I knew there was always going
to another war, so I decided to retire. Sandee and I married and I now know what true love really is. We now have our
own successful business and I serve a different commanding officer now -- God. God is my commanding officer. He
has been so loyal to me. I listen to his commands and I do my best to act upon them -instant obedience to orders. I am
now sharing my faith with anyone I can. I know that I am only here today because of the grace of God and I want to tell
everyone about it. He saved my life! I am now a different leader today. I want to influence people to know Jesus
Christ the way I do and I want others to help me to know Him better. I want to be the type of husband and father that
God is speaking about in Eph. Chap. 5 vs 21-33. I do not always treat my wife like Jesus. In fact I treat her badly at
times. I don’t always encourage my children and I have been guilty of breaking their spirit. And if you are anything like
me that is why I needed to talk to you about being a spiritual leader in your home first and foremost.
Whether anyone has ever said it this forward to you or not --it is YOU --not your wife, who must be the one bringing
your family to church. YOU –not your wife --must be the one who starts the devotion in your home with your children.
YOU must initiate grace at your dinner table and teach your children to be grateful. YOU can not leave the spiritual
growth of your children up to the Pastor or the Sunday school teacher. YOU – not your wife -- must ensure that there is
proper discipline in the home. YOU must be involved in the financial matters of the home. Don’t leave the burden
solely to your wife. YOU must initiate the communication within the family if there is a need or a problem. YOU must
show your children that you love your wife like you love Jesus. YOU have to set the example for your daughter – so
she knows what to look for in a husband. YOU have to set the example for your son so he knows how to lead and love
his family. YOU have to live your life, and love your wife and children according to the word of God. YOU must walk the
higher path and be a man of maturity and continue to love your wife even of she disrespects you. The Bible does not
say to love her only of she respects you. The Bible says to love her like you would love Jesus and to do otherwise is to
not love Jesus.
So, let us all take these tools and the natural ability that God has given us and start leading in our home…today!
Make sure your family knows that you love them – tell them everyday – show them everyday. If you have not acted
according to the Word of God ask God for forgiveness and then sit down with your family and ask them to forgive you.
This is a full time responsibility -- DON'T BE A PART TIME DAD!
I mentioned that I spent many years in the Marine Corps. For several hundred years the Marine Corps has taught us
(14) leadership traits. These traits I feel are absolutely effective in being a good businessman, husband, father,
neighbor, and Christian. I have a handout for you that show you these traits and I have cross referenced where an
example of this trait is found in the scriptures. Take a good look at these traits and take your own inventory. Rejoice in
the ones you have mastered and work diligently on the ones that you fall short on. Master them all and you have
become a leader. Tie this into your faith and you will be a powerful man of God. If God is putting this call of leadership
on your heart right now, rise to the occasion and pray to Him to give you strength and you will be blessed. And
remember “the transformation is forever”
God bless you all and thank you!